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You know you work in Corporate America in the 90's if...
o You sat at the same desk for 4 years and worked for three different companies. o Your company welcome sign is attached with Velcro. o Your resume is on a diskette in your pocket. o Your company logo on your badge is applied with stick-um. o You order your business cards in "half orders" instead of whole boxes. o When someone asks about what you do for a living, you lie. o You get really excited about a 2% pay raise. o You learn about your layoff on CNN. o Your biggest loss from a system crash is that you lose your best jokes. o You sit in a cubicle smaller than your bedroom closet. o Salaries of the members on the Executive Board are higher than all the Third World countries' annual budgets combined. o You think lunch is just a meeting to which you drive. o It's dark when you drive to and from work. o Fun is when issues are assigned to someone else. o Communication is something your group is having problems with. o You see a good looking person and know they're a visitor. o Free food left over from meetings is your main staple of your diet. o Weekends are those days your significant other makes you stay home. o Art involves a white board. o You're already late on the assignment you just got. o You work 200 hours for the $100 bonus check and jubilantly say "Oh wow, thanks!". o Dilbert cartoons hang outside every cube and are read by your co-workers only. o Your boss' favorite lines are "when you get a few minutes" or "when you're freed up." o Other favorite lines of your boss are "this isn't exactly what we need. It may be what we asked for, but things have changed." o Vacation is something you rollover to next year, or you try to use up three weeks between Christmas and New Years because otherwise will lose it, or you get a check for it every January. o Your relatives and family describe your job as "works with computers." o Change is the norm. o Nepotism is encouraged. o The only reason you recognize your kids and friends is because their pictures are hanging in your cube. o You only have makeup for fluorescent lighting. o You understood this entire list.
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