A man walks into a bar and the bartender said "Hey George, how about a beer." George replies "Yeah I'll take one, but call me Lucky." "Why call you Lucky?" "Well, I was changing a flat on the highway, when I realized I had forgot something in the car. Right after I walk away, a semi drives by and knocks the car right off the jack. Would of landed right on me." "Boy you are lucky." The next day George walks back into the bar and the bartender said "Hey Lucky, how about a beer." "Yeah I'll take one, but call me Lucky Lucky." "Now what happened?" "Well, me and my old lady was having sex last night, when the guy downstairs got mad, because of the noise and shot his gun off and the bullet got me right in the nuts." "Wait a minute, how is that Lucky?" "A minute earlier he would have got me right between the eyes".